BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! That’s what I heard on my door after I get in bed last night. “Can you tell me why my light is on?! You owe me a dollar,” my stepdad says. Apparently I left a hallway light on. That only added to the frustration I felt as I got back in bed. But it was better in the morning , I guess.

I don’t fell much like writing about work today, because not much happened. I got off early at 1:20 because we were slow. So I took the time top call etbu to get my loan stuff in order. Ahh..the memories. I could retrace the path through the building that my phone conversation was taking…IT Office…Business Office…Financial Aid Office…then it was down. And so was I, 45 minutes later. I hat to call Bank One and talk to the folks there, then call my company and find info on health insurance. No one was there. They were all in New Mexico. But that’s ok…as soon as I hung up the phone, it rings again. It’s Zadra, and her kid is throwing up at school. So it is off to work…again. So much for some time off.

I didn’t watch so much tv today. Instead, I looked through my etbu year book. I read every name, looked at every picture, and where every person was from. The closest thing I could find to me was Valley Mills (one person) and Groesbeck/Kosse (4 people, I knew them all before school). I wish I had some one to hang out with. I am sooo bored and lonely. So bored I want to go to the library and get a book to read…and I REALLY don’t like reading… at all!

However, Amy (I don’t know if I have mentioned this yet or not) wrote her final English paper about her relationship (or part of it) with me from the time we met until before we dated…skipped that part, and went to me leaving etbu. It is sooo sweet. I read it again today, it made me cry before when I read it, but not today. That is probably because she hasn’t made any effort to maintain any kind of friendship on her part, only an open-ended statement of “I’ll call you tomorrow.” Her picture is still on my desk, and I see it every day and think of her, but I don’t know what to think. I suppose that if I were still at school and this happened I would be doing the same thing about it – nothing. I would see her eventually, either with someone else, or her giving me the cold shoulder, or being too busy to talk much. But with my formerly ever-present screenname always online, there would always be time to talk, or she would call at 2:00 a.m.

I do remember that night I was up until $;00 a.m. doing something. We had spent the evening tog3ether and I had given her something or we had done something, I’m not sure. She went to bed at 1:30 or 2:00, and I stayed up to finish something. She woke back up at 4:00 a.m. and called me.

“I couldn’t sleep,” she says.
“I hoped you would call…for some reason, I was thinking ‘I wish she would call.'”

So we talked. I can’t do that here…my parents.

Anyway, I was about to throw away some pictures that my sister drew for me for Christmas, but then I saw where she erased and started over, and it caught my sentimental side, so I kept them. *sigh* If I wasn’t such a nice guy…I would have a lot less stuff that I didn’t need.

I guess that’s all for tonight. Laterz.

• Song in my head: “Walkin’ on Sunshine”
• Craving: Nothing really…not hungry
• Mood: Depressed/Nostalgic
• Thoughts: “Need girl…or need friend…or need computer…can’t have those, so I guess I will get a book or just write a lot”
• Quote: “Jesus was the greatest preacher. And he never preached a funeral. Once the dead sit up the funeral is over. But you better not go raising any dead at my Baptist Church, or you will have to raise us all!” – Mark Lowry, a Gaither Quartet singer