A number of things happened today. First I helped my brother with his program on his computer that he had been working on.

Then I went walking around town. I saw a part of it I hadn’t found before. Behind the Donut Shop there are several nice houses and a couple of them are for sale. So I passed out my lawn mowing fliers. I wanted to see D’Amber, but didn’t get to. Not until I got to work, did she show up. I think she’s pretty cute We’ve been pretty good friends since she got to high school. But I took a nap after lunch, and didn’t go to that part of town. I’ll probably go there next time.

Work today was non-stop, plus the fact that our sewage is backed up, and there’s nothing I can do about it. I’ll have to call the city and see what they can do, and then try the plumber. It made things much more difficult to do tonight though.

I don’t have much to say tonight, since I am pretty tired. Laterz.

• Song in my head: Bring me to life – Evanescence
• Craving: ice cream
• Mood: Sleepy / Distracted
• Thought: “Why would a person quit over a stupid write-up?”
• Quote: “I know…right?” – Tom @ DQ

Today was a little stressful. Some things weren’t done properly yesterday at DQ concerning the office work, and I think it is so to spite me. It doesn’t matter though. I had a lot to do today, and it took ample time to get it done.

The weather has been nice lately, and tomorrow I get to walk around the town and put up more fliers. I’m a little more excited this time, since it is my business, and I am investing money into it. Therefore, I have to make it prosperous to gain a return on my investments.

My lawn mower still isn’t fixed, but I don’t think it should be long now. I want to do other things to make money though. Rhinoceros Success has caused me to want to enjoy the journey to financial success. And I like to be creative, but have a hard time thinking up new ideas some times. I do have the occasional original idea, but usually the most common ones are improvements on already existing things.

Perhaps I could read up on Fen Shui, and con a number of City Folks out of money. I don’t have to believe it, just sell it. And I don’t have believe in it. I do think it is a creative way to decorate a room. For example, one thing is to put your desk facing a door or a window. I don’t know what it does, but I remember it. I think it’s a neat way to sit, but that’s all.

I could also do painting. I’ve watched a couple painting shows on PBS and learned how to paint. I have also been able to draw since 4th grade. The problem would be getting people to spend big bucks on them. I’ll think of something though.

(Usually when I say that in a conversation, like now, I have just thought of a good idea.)

That’s all for tonight. Laterz.

• Song in my head: Aaron Copeland’s “Ho-down”
• Craving: Eggs
• Mood: Curious / Enterprising
• Thought: “Bush’s Press Conference came on tonight…kinda interesting.”
• Quote: “When it comes to America’s Security, we don’t need the permission of anyone.” – President George W. Bush, 3/6/03

Wednesday…my eyes didn’t want to open at all this morning. But they did, and I got ready to hit the streets and take care of business. I had planned to be out all day. However, I finished all my things to do in less than an hour (plus it was really cold). So I came home and did some things.

I finally wrote Lindsey, and will mail it tomorrow. All I have left is to write Jay, Sarah, Jamie, and Laura. I also want ot write Lil’ Ben, and of course Benji when he talks to Beth.

I have thought of calling someone at school and having them get online for me to get the info I need. I just haven’t done it yet.

I watched Oprah today and she did a show on genius kids. It was pretty good. I also got some business ideas from them, like a stationary company, or chocolate candy company. They were merely things I could have done (and can do if there is a market for it). The problem is I don’t know what there is a market for in this town. I’m sure there is a number of markets available in Arlington, as well as lawn mowing around my dad’s hours.

I already have a logo for whatever I do. It’s the logo I used for my Autumn Softworks presentation in high school; a little clay man I made the last 5 minutes of Art Class one day, and the only clay model that wasn’t ruined during firing, by the teacher.

Well, I guess that’s about all for tonight. Laterz.

• Song in my head: Man of Means – Randy Travis
• Craving: Meatloaf
• Mood: Sleepy / Enterprising
• Thought: “If only I could think of something that everyone wants, or a way to make everyone want something I have.”
• Quote: “Trailers for sale or rent…” – Randy Travis

Hmm…today the neighborhood dogs decided to dump over the neighborhood trash cans, so I had to watch to make sure they didn’t knock over ours.

Then I went to work. Lately I’ve been unable to concentrate. I think I think better when there is a bunch to do at work. We’ve been slow the last couple days, and I’ve had problems remembering everything to get done. It’ll be ok though.

I worked with Andrea, the new girl, today. She’s doing really well. She’s a small girl, fits the description of a “nerd” but isn’t. She looks too young (and really is) to be engaged. Oh well, that’s her deal.

We started our new salad promo tonight. I was not at work to see how it went for them. I tasted the praline syrup and it isn’t all that great…neither is the oriental dressing for the Oriental Grilled Chicken Salad.

I’m pretty sleepy right now. I have tomorrow off, and a list of things to get done. Perhaps my parents will see that I am motivated to take care of my business. Well, that’s all for tonight. Laterz.

• Song in my head: Theme from Fraiser
• Craving: Oriental Grilled Chicken Salad
• Mood: Sleepy / Distracted
• Thought: “Stay out all day tomorrow, and see what I can see…”
• Quote: “The vacuum created by a failure to communicate will quickly be filled with rumor, misrepresentation, drivel, and poison.” – Perpetual Calendar, July 29

Today started out great, then turned ok, then it just sucked. But I am in high spirits.

I read the second motivation book. It wasn’t as good as the first. But it did give me ideas and insight on job performance.

I woke up to the sound of rain on the roof. That was when my day started going down hill. The rain didn’t stop until after lunch. So that put a big dent in all my plans. I’ll have to postpone them until Wednesday.

I am almost done rewriting Autumn IQX source code, and then I can make modifications to create IQX2. I also came up with a new background for it. It looks better on paper than on a grid, but its neat none-the-less.

I didn’t do too much else today. Work was slow. I did find out how to fix my lawn mower for about $3-4. So I’m gonna try that on Wednesday. If it doesn’t work, then I can buy one from a friend for $75. Four $20 jobs would pay it off easily.

I came home to a lecture though, and threats of being kicked out sooner. I wasn’t intimidated about arguing back because I was in the bathroom with the door closed, fixing to take a shower. I only have one problem. I am being blamed for not siding with my brother at work. If I do side with him, then I discriminate against the others. It doesn’t matter what I say, truth or lie, it will never be good enough for my step dad. If it is not his way, then it’s not good enough. I think that my position as my brother’s boss is being used on a personal level by my parents to get me in trouble. My boss is the one that deals with my brother, not me. All the things I am catching flack for are my boss’s mistakes. There is nothing I can say that will get my parents off my back about it. Maybe my brother should tell them I have nothing to do with the problems they are having at DQ. If that won’t work, maybe they should take their own advice that he (my step dad) gives his employees and find a job where they can be happy. After all, I was here first, they didn’t have problems before when he and I worked together, and they didn’t have problems when I was gone. When actually that did, it’s not me, it’s the boss.

Ugh…Anyway, that’s all for tonight. Laterz.

• Song in my head: “Hold Me” – oldie
• Craving: Hamburgers
• Mood: Frustrated
• Thought: “I want to spend as little time in the house as possible.”
• Quote: “Concentrate your attention on where you want to go, not away from where you don’t want to be.” – Perpetual Calendar, July 28

Well, now I start a new journal section. It happens about every month (on average). So I can only talk about personal things and things that deal with me alone. It’ll be tough, but I’ll do my best.

I was extremely bored today. I started writing Autumn IQX2, but first will have to copy Autumn IQX onto paper in a readable format. That will take 8 papers – 16 pages, which is about 530 lines of calculator code. It’s one of the longest programs I have written. And that is just the shell of Autumn IQX. It doesn’t include the dll files and other exe files it takes to actually make it work. Then I’ll have to re-read and re-learn and re-define some variables, techniques, and code efficiency. Plus add comments. I could also write it in C++, but I’d have to learn to program graphics first.

So, I gave up on that for today after 2 pages, some IQX2 comments, and a desire to redesign the desktop of the program.

I started to whittle a canoe out of a cedar block from the back yard, but my interest was soon diverted to chores. Then I noticed a book that we’ve had in our family for a long time, but I’ve never read it.

it is called Rhinoceros Success. A type of self-motivation book. I read it (120+ pages) in about 2 hours – the quickest I’ve ever read a book. I liked it and decided to do what it says. I basically have to push the unimportant things in life aside and push forward to make money and succeed. Tomorrow I don’t work until 4:00, so I have time to bop around town and make more fliers for lawn mowing. I also want to explore more of the town.

Last time I passed out fliers, I found some houses that I had never noticed or seen before. I’m gonna check them out, and possibly stop by Foster Properties and see if they have anything for rent.

I’ve wanted to do a lot lately, but always find something to do too, or get sidetracked.

I’ve also got to do the payroll tomorrow morning. Hopefully they didn’t do it today while I wasn’t there. I’ll see though.

That’s all for tonight. Laterz.

• Song in my head: Girl all the bad guys want – Bowling for soup
• Craving: Macaroni & Cheese
• Mood: Energetic / Motivated
• Thought: “Hmm…I can be successful…if I give up on my friends, and only focus on success…Is it worth it?”
• Quote: “Money talks, mine says ‘Goodbye.’” – Checkbook quote

And so, this closes another section in my journal writing. Next section I will start with things I can publish: my thoughts, nothing related to any people in my life, unless I get their permission.

Justin didn’t show up to work today. Tom won’t elaborate on the reason, and Justin’ didn’t call or give notice. According to the rules, Justin will get wrote up. If he misses 3 days he can be terminated by law for unavailability. But it is deemed as a voluntary termination if they are a no-show anyway. We’ll see what my boss does.

Well, with Justin not being there, Jackie came in early by accident which worked out perfectly. We were busy busy today. Just Jackie and I. I got everything done, though I stayed until 5:30 (I got there at 7).

I had to get there early to put away the extra-large grocery order, and count everything in the store, and set up the store, and do the paperwork. Plus, I got to cook today. I was worn out. I wouldn’t have been able to do Ina’s yard tonight if I had waited. Not to mention the rain that came a day too soon. It’s supposed rain big tomorrow.

I watched Patch Adams tonight when I got home. It was pretty good. Almost cried a couple times. I’ve learned to not the emotional parts in movies lately, and not just watch them through. It was basically another reminder that I’m single. Oh well…I am working on that, slightly.

I think that is pretty much all for tonight. I wanted to finish this section so I could start new.

I’ll talk about Autumn IQX2 that I am going to work on soon. I’ll have to review my notes and decipher what all the variables are for so I can reproduce the same level of “intelligence” and more in my next program.

I may also just start from scratch and create a new one with a new name and a new design.

I’ll add more animation, less obstructive graphics, and more features. I had planned to write an address book, and some other things, but I can’t think of them.

I started to write Hearts before I left high school, but it wouldn’t follow my logic, so I may also take a look at that and use a flow-chart to get it working properly.

Programmable calculators have such a great potential, people overlook it entirely, and use it for mere games and cheating on tests. But if you make the calculator “think” then you don’t have to. Enough of all that though. I have to save room for my quote. Laterz.

• Song in my head: In the Club – 50 Cent
• Craving: Sandwiches
• Mood: Creative / Worn Out
• Thought: “I’m gonna explore the town some more Monday and pass some more fliers out. I need more money.”
• Quote: “I love you with a straight forward kind of love, because that is all I know. / Our love is so close, your hand on my chest is my hand. / When you close your eyes, I go to sleep.” – Robin Williams, Patch Adams

Ugh…no work until 4:00. That means I have to be at home until I go to work.

Well…I wake up this morning with an agenda, including continuing my college education myself, by teaching myself Visual C++ without a computer. I also write Beth’s letter and it is now ready to send.

I did not plan on spending 4 hours working on my neighbor’s lawn.

My parents have a 5-gallon gasoline thing in their garage. To me it smells like gasoline, and I used it last time, so I’ll use it this time. However, my mower won’t start. Then, and only then do they tell me there is Diesel in the garage. I would think that they would inform me to leave the big canister alone and use the small one. Nope. So I have to weed-eat her front lawn, and then rank it, then sweep. A job that normally only takes 1 hour or less, took 4 hours. I ended up with 4 bags of mulch for compost. Hopefully my parents will use it for their garden. If not, I may start a garden.

So I go to work tired, and thankfully we were semi-busy. However, Steve tells me that everyone in the store but my brother is against me. They say I spend too much time in the office. So to correct that, I am going to be out there with them, working my butt off and making sure they are doing the same. If they will complain that I am not doing my job (which is different than theirs) then I will do “my job” and they will do theirs. That’s all I have to say about that.

Also, concerning the note I left Zadra about keeping the correct change in the drawers; she told Steve that it made her feel stupid. I only have to say to that: don’t act like it, and I won’t think it.

I am taking a new direction at DQ. I am going to take my job seriously. No more running out of things…no more “let them do their job, and I’ll do mine.” I’ve pretty much had it when it comes to working with people. I have found one general truth about people in 20 years: They’re stupid.

Anyway, we got out of DQ at 30 minutes past 10. I always knew it could be done, and I always knew I could do it. The only thing that puts them back is the idiots that come in 10 minutes before we close.

But I am dead tired, and my stepdad talked to me after I got off work. He wants another car payment in March, but I tried and tried to tell him that I could not afford it because of later expenses. He doesn’t care. Everything has to be timed perfectly with my payments so I don’t go broke. Hmph…

I did get the weed eater for my lawn service, and I have to fix the mower, and pay for fliers. They have basically given up on me.

It seems that everyone is against me, and they probably are. All I want to do is move out, start over, and show the world who they gave up on: Chris Chiles, the guy that can do anything. Unrealistic? Not in the slightest. If something is desired to be done, someone knows how, and I’ll figure it out.

Laterz.

• Song in my head: Bring me to life – Evanescence
• Craving: Ice Cream
• Mood: Disturbed / Tired
• Thought: “D’Amber came to DQ today. She was looking fine! Her and I are going to hook up…watch.”
• Quote: “I can sum up everything I’ve learned in life into 3 words: People are stupid.”

Well…no work today. I did however walk around town. I had to pass out my lawn mowing flyers to the 3rd and 4th quadrants of twon. I also inquired at Texaco and Dollar General for part-time jobs. Neither were hiring.

Today was pretty much boring after that. I wanted to write the girls I hadn’t written, and ay, but there was no motivation. Instead I took a nap…a much needed nap.

We had catfish and watched Survivor. Its kinda pathetic to see the guys lose because they are focused on the girls who hardly said more than 5 words to them. I suppose they don’t know that the girls (most of them) will flirt with a guy to gain advantage – just as in Gone with the Wind. I explained to my mom that some girls don’t know they are flirtting though…and that most guys will take friendly gestures as a love interest. I had to learn that one myself.

Well…that’s about all for tonight. Mister Rodgers died today. It’s pretty sad. He’s been on TV ever since TV was invented.

Well, my brother and sister were working on a puzzle for the last couple days. I came and helped them out tonight and we finished it. I got the privilage of putting in the last puzzle piece simply because they didn’t expect it.

I also found out the timeframe for my relocation – June 10th-ish – or when ever I get my car paid off. So now I can write my people and tell them how things are. Oh well…pros & cons. Laterz.

• Song in my head: Best of Intentions – Travis Tritt
• Craving: Fish
• Mood: Bored / Longing
• Thought: “I suppose I should start preparing my mind to cope with moving to my dad’s.”
• Quote: “I could take an initative, but then I wouldn’t be able to say ‘Oh!’” – Will, Will & Grace

Well, it was pretty slow today at work again. Steve has decided to hire Andrea and work her every other Sunday. That means that I am going to have to call Candice and let her know that the position is filled…when Steve tells me it is. I should have had her check back on Saturday, instead of saying I would call her.

I was going through my dresser drawer and found a letter Beth wrote me before she left at the end of our freshman year. She was so thankful in it that we were friends. That was the first time I had been told how much I had impacted a person’s life by just being her friend. Now I am going to write her, Lindsey, and Jamie. The only problem is that my address may change before they can write back. I really miss them all. They all brought something different in to my life. Beth: simplicity of fun. Lindsey: Humor and relationship curiosity. Jamie: Spontaneity &  a girl I could never have. Basically every girl I have bet has provided me with a lesson or quality or something that I took note of and learned from.

Now, about my dad’s…I still don’t know how to feel about that. I guess in my mind, because there is no set date or plan, it may not happen. That is probably why I don’t get concerned or scared. I can function fine with a schedule and deadlines to meet, as long as there is something to enforce them. However, open-ended plans and self-imposed deadlines with consequences that only affect me don’t have much bearing on my motivation. If I am the only one affected, I decide whether or not the task is worth the consequences and whether or not I can bear the consequences.

For example, the news that I was being kicked out to my dad’s didn’t shock me much because I can bear those consequences.

The decision to stay at etbu or come home left me debating whether or not I could financially survive on my own at ETBU. I couldn’t so I coped with coming home and set my mind at ease with it, and then prepared my friends for the news.

Well…that’s all for tonight. I’ll try and analyze myself more tomorrow. Laterz.

• Song in my head: When the Saints go marching in – The Cathedrals
• Craving: Spaghetti
• Mood: Uncertain / Melancholy
• Thought: “I have a new old picture of Beth on my desk now.”
• Quote: “If the shoe don’t fit, we must acquit.” – Wayans, on My Wife and Kids